| Following is an excerpt from The Trivial Times . It is set | | | | cycle to discover new continence continents, and |
| in a newspaper/browser setting. It is a column by an | | | | ended up in Venezuela or something. Feeling peckish |
| "expert" in historical matter, hence the title. Some | | | | (understandable after an eight hour cycle against the |
| consideration must be made for the many memory | | | | wind ), he went into a burger joint. He often remarked |
| inconsistencies of Mick Savage. He does his best! | | | | "Burgers in Venezuela invariably have more grissle |
| Mick here. | | | | (cartilage, in English ) than venison in Boston (American, |
| It was a long, long time ago. Sweden, North Europe, | | | | in America )". |
| Scotland, Ireland, North America and Canada were | | | | I'll never forget his adventurous accounts of punctured |
| part of the same mainland. This mainland existed | | | | rubber, mutilated beef, and Brazilian bicycle clips! |
| before the crustal plates separated, and before the | | | | How would such an adventurer find time for my great |
| Atlantic came into being. To give you a reference point | | | | grandmother to be, you might well ask? Well, she had |
| in history, my great grandfather was just a young man. | | | | a few bucks behind her, and some clever measures |
| I remember with joy, the historical accounts he | | | | were needed to guarantee possession (old word for |
| impressed on us, as we ate around a primitive butane | | | | love ). Wait until you see the genius of this globetrotter |
| barbeque. To clarify that, we sat around it eating, | | | | globepeddler, depending on air pressure status within |
| rather than eating the grass and sundry bushes around | | | | the inner-tube. |
| it. | | | | In a bid to "mask" the stench of sweat (essential for |
| Well, he told us with crystal clarity how he used to | | | | long distance ), he used a "primitive talc" powder, or |
| cycle from Canada to Sweden in five hours, with no | | | | "de-odorant dust". By inverting his bicycle and hand |
| more than one puncture repair kit, and a bicycle, | | | | peddaling it, he was able to make dust out of any |
| presumably. He didn't have to tell us every single detail! | | | | material by pressing it against the high-speed spokes. |
| The roads at the time, weren't much like the | | | | The material he chose was similar to what we know |
| motorways/highways of today. Instead of the quartz | | | | as conventional coal/graphite/carbon. |
| and limestone impregnated asphalt of today, they had | | | | Hence, the term "CARBON DATING" was coined. |
| a simple sandstone. Incidentally, this was readily | | | | While a little messy, he invented a perfect product to |
| available from Japan which was only a few hundred | | | | "soak" the "SOUP of ADVENTURE". |
| yards away, at the time. Punctures were common | | | | As with any back passage, more material will be |
| place and both courtship and commerce were reliant | | | | forthcoming. Thanks for your understanding of times |
| on a high performance repair kits. | | | | past, however trivial, Mick Savage. |
| On one particular day, I recall him saying, he went for a | | | | |