Is the American Dream at your Chrysler dealership?

It's very hard to 'crack America'. Many have tried andmore civilised and upon initial inspection this appears so.
failed, whether it's film, TV or music. For every RickyThe windows now go down and then back up again,
Gervais, there's a multitude of unsuccessful suitors,the tent on the roof has been correctly erected and
including the likes of Oasis and the Manic Streetthe pedals can even be adjusted to your shoe size -
Preachers. Mention either of those bands in Europeby electronic means would you believe. Thankfully
and you'll be inundated with fans. Ask the question indespite this, the car is as civilised as Borat at a dinner
America and no doubt a blank face will point you in theparty and Chrysler should be thanked for keeping their
direction of a desert or church.cocktail, ten parts whisky and zero parts mixer. Power
You see, whilst the world becomes Americanised, thehas rocketed from 400 to 500 horsepower, with the
US is very picky about what it accepts onto it's shorescar's weight remaining unchanged. This healthy
- with the one exception of cars. For every Chevroletequation results in 0-60 in 3.9 seconds and a top
or Chrysler dealer there are BMW and Mercedesspeed surpassing 190 mph.
Benz franchises competing. Europe you see, knowsIf the devil was a car, then look no further. The
how to build a car and historically, despite Henry Fordexhaust bellows and the tyres squeal as they struggle
getting things rolling with the Model T, America hasto get any of the power onto the black stuff. The
lagged behind. Therefore, flying in the face of theinterior is cramped, the materials used are so cheap
American Dreamâ„¢, European cars dominatethat having got my calculator out, I can confirm the
the roads around the globe, with the US beggingtotal is the same as two pints of beer. If you've played
Europe for acceptance of it's motoring offerings.Gran Turismo, you'll know the car handles like a
Well America's deliverance may well come from yourhippopotamus on ice and that at the end of any corner
local Chrysler dealer, although there are a fewyou'll be going backwards. The real version shows just
stipulations first. You need to be extremely rich, havehow realistic the game is.
no children and be prepared to receive whiplash everyIt looks like the work of Lucifer too. The car literally
time you accelerate. Has the Chrysler Grand Voyagerbulges with aggression and looks like it's going 150 mph
been fitted with a turbo where the rear seats shouldstanding still. The front bumper could easily eat a
be? No - with a riotous bellow the Dodge Viper is backnumber of small children and the vents on the bonnet
in town. Ok, so this is a car only the top 1% of thelook like they could suck a country the size of Wales
world's population could even consider buying, but itinto the engine. Chrysler's big problem then is who will
clearly demonstrates that when they put their minds tobuy the devil on wheels? Even David Beckham may
it, America can build a car that quite simply is a brilliantthink the car is too bling, leaving the likes of 10 cent and
monster.his rapper friends…oh, 50 cent, my apologies, to
The old Viper was conceived and born when Chryslerfoot the bill.
were in one of their financial crises. Despite this, forCompare the Viper on paper to a Ferrari, Porsche,
approximately $50 million (car design usually cost $1Lamborghini et al and it'll lose. It isn't the fastest; it's not
billion) and only 17 men the Viper was launched andthe prettiest and definitely not the best handling. All this
showed little signs of cost cutting. Admittedly youthough, is like saying "no" to Cindy Crawford because
couldn't open the windows and the roof looked like theshe has a mole. Despite a flaw or two, the Viper is -
last time I attempted to build a tent, but under theno arguments please - a supermodel for the road. Yes
bonnet was an 8-litre V10 engine that threw 400it's high maintenance, hugely expensive and shouty but
horsepower onto the road. Subtlety was not a strongisn't that the idea of a supercar? What Chrysler have
point, but it is widely recognised and loved all over thedone is create the perfect monster and show that
globe - even if that is thanks to a strong showing onAmerica has what it takes to compete with Europe's
the Gran Turismo racing game.finest. Chrysler and financial crisis will hopefully never
So what's changed with the latest offering? Wellbe mentioned in the same sentence again.
worryingly, Chrysler announced the new car would be